Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Bad Behavior

Hello my friends, we had the most gorgeous summer day today....absolutely beautiful.

I spent a quiet day today, reading newspapers, listening to the news, watching sports and reading a book. I was so disappointed today, people I enjoyed and respected showed a side of themselves I hadn't seen before. I watched a highly skilled and highly paid tennis player loose her composure and took her frustrations out with bad language and no respect for her opponent, umpires or lines people. I watched people march with ignorant signs spewing hate and anger, I saw a celebrity take away a precious moment from an innocent because he didn't like that his favorite choice hadn't won an award.....what is happening, why are people forgetting that there are ways and means to express how we feel without being disrespectful. Why are people spewing hate, why are they so angry? Is it because they are disappointed in themselves so they have to blame others, is it because they are misinformed or is it because they are taking medications they shouldn't be or even worse not taking medication when they should. Why are people inciting fear.....I can't believe they enjoy this, I can't even believe they are doing it intentionally.

We live in a world that was created in love for all of us. I was taught to love, respect and help our neighbour. I was taught if I couldn't say something nice about someone then I shouldn't say anything at all. I was taught that even though someone may look different than I did, or go to a different church it didn't mean I was going to heaven any faster than they were. Four letter words were written on walls where no one actually lived and no young man would ever speak them around a young lady, let alone the young lady shouting them out in anger.

Whatever has happened is not a good thing. We may have lived a simple life but it was filled with love, kindness and one would walk miles to bring a pie or roast to someone who was sick. Neighbours looked out for each other and each other's children, sons and daughter's not only loved their parents they showed that love in many ways.

I agree times have changed, and technology has helped a huge world become smaller and bring us all closer together, but does it mean that people have become smaller, narrow minded, rude, selfish and disrespectful. No I do not fault technology for that. Each one of us must take the responsibility, if we go to church on Sunday we cannot possibly leave there and forget everything the Ten Commandments teaches us on Monday. How anyone can take joy from the death of anyone is mind boggling, who do we think we are that we can judge anyone. To these people I say, let those without sin cast the first stone or as my mother would say, those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. I truly believe that as long as people allow and tolerate these actions they will continue. It's up to each individual to set an example and show love, caring and kindness to others.

Oh I know and God knows I am far from perfect, I have many faults and have made many mistakes. I cannot nor do I even try to justify them but if ever I act like what I saw and read about today I would want to be corrected and reminded to walk in the others shoes so that I could learn a lesson....a good lesson.

The most honest and comforting things I have read today have been my blogging friends post, it seems my friends here know the true meaning of loyalty to each other and encourage each other in all things good. Tonight I am going to pray that all people will find their way back to a heart full of love and respect for others, that greed, jealousy, and all the harmful words that can never be taken back, they are still out there, will bite their tongues even if they bleed so that they never forget what a beautiful world we have been so blessed to be born into, and never say words that can hurt another's reputation. One can always apologize and the apology be accepted but those words are still out there and there will be someone who will believe them without even knowing the offended person personally. It is just wrong.

Good night my friends, God Bless and many, many hugs....:-)


cinner said...

Hi Bernie, yes we can always be surprised by the actions of others!Sometimes the bad behavior creates more excitement than the good. Sometimes I think it must be part of gettin press, even though it is bad, better than none. It is a crazy world we live in. My grandma and my Great Aunt were two ladies, I never once heard them sware! I wish the old ways still were around for the younger generation. Take care Bernie, hope you get a good night sleep!

Blessings each day said...

Because of the advances in technology we are able to hear the notorious minority of people with bad behaviour very quickly and openly. If only we could see the goodness of the 'majority' splashed across the headlines or the Internet!

As I keep on saying over and over, there is just simply not enough love in this world and so we must all learn to love and be like that child who wrote that you learn to really love by loving someone you don't even like!

And prayer...lots of prayer and I do pray every night for peace in this world, but much more than peace, loving and caring for one another above all.

Thank you for being a part of the answer to this chaos in a world that needs harmony, my friend and then you also uplift all others trying to bring harmony, Bernie!

blessings and harmonious hugs,


Eileen said...

You know, Bernie, I just left you a whole long comment but deleted it because it was like I was writing a post!
Between you and Marcy, and my brother-in-law, you all have me thinking on the subjects of tolerance, doing for others without expecting anything in return, judging others, etc.

I think I'll have to do a post on all this soon. It all raises so many questions in my mind.
I have a friend who once said to me, "Eileen, let's face it, we're just crummy Christians! We'll never be like the good ones!"
She made me laugh, but I think it rings true!

Anyway, I hope you feel better, Bernie.
And I think you should adopt the mantra I've been trying to adopt lately ~ "Expect Nothing And You'll Never Be Disappointed"!
I actually try to adopt that with my kids and their behavior, but lately I'm trying to do it with the whole world!
Love you!, Eileen

glnroz said...

the world has ssemed to have gone crazy, hasn't it. I think I found you blog through Kay's. Hope I havent intruded. thanx have a good day..glenn

Wanda said...

Good morning Bernie...if only everyone thought to live their life in such a manner...but I do find good in so many people...you would think their knowledge and compassion would trickle down to everyone...why is is so hard for these hate filled people to not wake up to the harm they do to others as well as themselves. We may not "love" everybody, but we can be civil to anyone...I would have thought our instant communication would have helped to open people's eyes...but some are forever blind to what they see or hear...not open to change!

Maybe these rude confrontations lately will do some good and open a few eyes!

Smiles forever Bernie,

Gail said...


I, like you was quite taken back by the behaviors of the tennis player, the host of the video award and the congressman or senator that yelled at the President. All of these insulting, rude behaviors are SO unfortunate and likje you said, "wrong". My/our motto or mantra is, to always maintain my integrity and the integrity of the person to whom I am speaking"..... as we both know, not everyone haz a similar 'mantra...sigh. And I asked the questions lie you did Bernie, "why is this happening, what makes people think they can do this, and so forth".....and the sad and very simple answer is, "Because they can".........and it is a gross mis-use of power/role beyond tolerance. Phew. ANd I too agree that in blog land we are ALL so kind and encouraging to each other. The out pouring of love and understanding I receive about my dilemma with my daughters the other day was so wonderfully overwhelming with support. :-)

You just keep being wonderful, loving, kind you, and I will too. And that means that you and I are the change we want the world to be.

Love and repsect

Margie said...

Good morning Bernie
Oh, I saw that outbusrt from Serena!
She did apologize to her fans but I wonder why she was so angry!
There are many angry people in the world and they do take their anger out on others and it's not a good thing!
Angry people are very scary people!

I myself just try my very best to treat others just as I want them to treat me.
Don't you think that's the best way to live one's life?

Thanks for your enlightenig post, my friend.

Peace & joy to you, always!


Bernie said...

Hi cinner, it takes all kinds to make a world, but sometimes I think the crazy ones are taking over and I think we are allowing it.....oh well one can only be the change they want to see and hope all will remember what it's like to be a kind, compasionate human being......:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Hi Marcy, I so agree we are seeing the sights and sounds of a minority. Perhaps it is time for the majority to stand up and be heard and not allow or tolerate bad behavior in our presence. We so need more people like you who believe in the power of prayer, I still believe in miracles Marcy and I feel it's a miracle we need right now to set the world on right path to peace.....love you my friend.....:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Hi Eileen, I had to smile as I read your post as I know you have strong feelings on this subject, would loved to have heard them. I cannot live by expecting nothing just so that I won't be disappointed, I think this would make my life easier but I know I wouldn't be happy in that kind of world. I want to only excpect and accept the best of people, I know most people know better and when you know better you do better, or at least we should.
Have a great day my friend, I love you......:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

glnroz, thank you for visiting, you are always welcome here and Kay is a wonderful common thread between us. The world has gone crazy just now but God willing with the help of good, caring and kind people it will right itself.
Have a great day my friend...Hugs

Bernie said...

Hi Wanda, oh if only you were right and everything would trickle down to others, let's pray the good will overcome the negative that is happening right now. Life is so precious and it breaks my heart to see how people are wasting their valuable time being rude and hurting others. You know me my friend, if I am thinking it I have to express it, well don't have to but want to. I am not always right either, its only my opinion......Luv ya....:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Hi Gail, we are so on the same page on this subject. The only thing I think is perhaps I have been a bit too harsh and should not allow one incident to form my impression of others...it is just that lately there have been so many rude incidents happening in front of us and no one is being held accountable.
Have a great day my friend....Hugs

Bernie said...

Hi Margie, I think perhaps I was a bit harsh and should not of used Serena as an example, she has done many good things as well. I have just found that there are so many rude people speaking out at inappropriate places and times lately, and of course being me just had to say something. I agree Margie we should treat others the way we want to be treated and in all honesty I wouldn't want my worst moments to be on video so after getting it out of my system I realize I have to lighten up but I know I will not tolerate rude people in life, just no time for it.
Have a great day my friend, love you......:-0 Hugs

Choices said...

Hi Bernie,
It is always so surprising to me as well that are people who are so angry and show disrespect for others. I have found that it is not only adults who show this behavior, but sometimes the children that I teach show all this things. Where does that come from? I am always amazed. I do think that if you show respect to others hopefully it will trickle down.
Thank you for this post.
I hope you are having a wonderful day.
Take care.

Wander to the Wayside said...

It seems like everyone is on the same page with this one today, as half the blogging world as well as the media are responding in some way to the hatred, intolerance, cynicism, rudeness and disrespect that seems to be running rampant in today's society. I think it's always been there, but not so vocal or evident. I guess in the long run all we can do is moniter our own selves, because everyone who needs to be called out on their behavior is too self-involved to pay attention. Good post, Bernadette! (Linda)

Diana said...

Hi Bernie,
I have analyzed this to death in my mind. I don't know all of the answers but one thing always comes to mind. And I am sure some would boo hoo my thoughts. When life was simpler up until somewhere before the 60's and 70's when nuclear families still existed, most of the time both parents were around to teach their children right from wrong. Mom's were around the house more and discipline ( which by the way, means to teach) was not as frowned upon. There were family dinners, and religion was more a way of life than a choice. I guess what I am trying to say is parents actually did there job in so far as teaching morals, respect and manners. Of coarse television and computers weren't used as a constant babysitter either.
Yet still even with all of the changes we have gone through I do believe it all stems from how we were brought up by our parents. And that's probably not the only reasons but it is the one that I always think of.
Love Di

Bernie said...

Hi Linda, you are right about all the attention this subject is getting, now if only everyone would be held accountable and accept their responsabilites we will all be able to move forward. I feel anything done in love is not wrong even though everyone doesn't agree with me. I respect everyone's opinion even though I may not agree with it....that is what is wonderful about living with free speech, so sad that not everyone accepts free speech as a gift and only use it to promote their own self interest....I pray some day we will all look at others with love regardless of color, creed, or station in life.
Have a wonderful day my friend, may it be filled with love...Hugs

Bernie said...

Choices, I think it must be a real challenge to be a teacher today, in fact I think it takes a special person to even do this essential work. God bless you for teaching our next generation.
Our world is so full of anger right now, I am not sure why but I only know I don't like it.
I think it's so important that we all love and respect each other.
Have a wonderful day my friend.
as always.....:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Di, I think you are onto something there....when parents knew their rolls and everyone knew what was expected of them, there was far less floundering around, our kids knew what was right and wrong and they respected the rules of their parents and their home. Too many times today parents should be parents and not try so hard to be their children's friend. They can have many friend's but will only ever have one mother and father.
Love you.......:-) Hugs

Garnetrose said...

Yes, I saw some of those actions you discussed and I would like to say it does not happen often but it is getting to happen more and more frequently. That is sad. Like you, I was raised to show respect for others and to keep my mouth shut if I could not think of something good to say about them.

I never heard swearing while I was living with my foster mom. She was a kind, genteel lady and earned respect from all she knew. I also had an English teacher tell me that if I had to use cuss words to get my point across, I did not have very good command of the English language. She was right.

Elleen..all christians are sinners and equal in God's eyes. Some are just better at doing the good stuff. **s**

Suzanne said...

You took on a rough subject and modestly dissected it. Lovely Bern!

Rebecca. Harlan, IN said...

Such GOOD news about Lucy.

Such SAD news about bad behavior being broadcast! Sometimes I think the less attention these public figures receive, the better it would be for EVERYone!

Actually it comes as no surprise to me when I consider the way our Heavenly Father has been ignored and pushed out of conversation and instruction. It's everyone for himself or herself now - and maybe always HAS been. Even in the Bible it says, "All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned everyone to his own way...."

The line is being drawn dramatically between those who love Jesus and those who have no interest in Him.

That's what I think :)

Teresa @ Grammy Girlfriend said...

a great post...Had a couple of hours to blog hop this afternoon...Enjoyed reading yours....Hope you will stop by my Christmas blog...There is a great giveaway drawing on Oct 1...http://grammyababychangeseverything.blogspot.com

The Retired One said...

I too was disgusted by these behaviors. I think he was drunk and high (no excuse, but I think it played a major role) and she may even be on steroids to better perform.
Regardless, if they are on drugs, it is still their responsibility NOT to be.
It is disgraceful.
We also had a member of Congress here call our President a liar while he was trying to give a speech to the Congress and people of the U.S.A. If our leaders can't even show respect for one another, who else can be disgustingly rude.
I agree, it comes to upbringing and ethics. Something that needs more education while kids are young and continued consequences for bad behavior as they age.
What happens to people now? They are rewarded with book deals, movie contracts and more money if they are an athelete or movie star.
There lies the problem.

Anonymous said...

Hi Bernie (so glad you allow anonymous comments...or I would be speechless...and you know that would never do!)
I, too was amazed at the way people let their anger take control of their lives...not only ruins the moment, but ruins a part of themselves. This was a very moving post...I feel your passion here...and I do wish there was more love shown one to another.
~Hugs and smiles from Jackie~

Bernie said...

Hi Garnet, I am hoping people are going through a trend, trying to push everything to the edge just to see what they can get away with. As long as we allow it and not keep them accountable it will continue, I for one have had enough of really bad behavior and I have decided I will not tolerate it either in my home or my prescence...I have never allowed anyone to make fun of anyone in front of me nor speak ill of anyone who was a different color, or creed now I am not going to allow rudness or bad behavior either. It has to start somewhere and if I am going to complain about it then I have to do something about it....thanks for your comment sweetie.....:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Suzane, it is a touch subject and I have no problem addressing it as long as I treat everyone with respect and understanding....no one should tolerate bad behavior. Thank you for your comment...Hugs

Bernie said...

Rebecca, thank you for your wonderful comment, I do feel though it should be brought up and those who are using this behavior should be "called" out and be made accountable, if enough people refuse to tolerate it than maybe, just maybe we can curtail it. I do feel when we see a wrong we should do whatever we can to make it right......:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Teresa, thank you for popping by, will pop over shortly and look forward to doing so.....:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Joan, I too heard that elected official say "you lie", it did give him his 15 minutes of fame but it should of been shame...we cannot blame bad behavior on those uneducated now, some of the top officials, high paid sports figures seem to think the rules don't apply to them. The sad part is that people will imitate this behavior or believe such lies being said.....they should always be held accountable, we all should be. To me it's just not acceptable.
Have a great day......:-) Hugs

Bernie said...

Ah Miss Jackie, so happy you have left a comment....love the connection. Let's pray that people all start and end their day with love, with a dash of respect and kindnees sprinkled throught out.
Take care my friend...luv ya...Hugs

Anvilcloud said...

Serena really lost it, didn't she? She'll probably become a better person because of it.

Tamara said...

Oh Bernie, love your post! And you're right, so very right. People just can't be happy spewing that kind of hatred. I've learned that if someone is hurt, it often appears they delight in seeing others hurting. Such a sad state of affairs. Love, peace and harmony...

Hugz, my friend!

Bernie said...

A/C I completely agree, Serena has done so many wonderful things for her sport, her culture and her country. I don't thing she should ever be judged on this one episode...I think I included her as I saw and read everything on the same day. I really should of thought it out a bit better, but was so disgusted with all I witnessed yesterday. Have a great day my friend...:-)Hugs

Bernie said...

Tamara, I do think as well that people who are hurting do reach out to purposely hurt others, sad really....but maybe by loving the sinner and not the sin we can overcome these things....:-) Hugs

Anonymous said...

Hi Bernie,

Thanks for this post! I noticed that very few - if any - men reacted to this post, so I wanted to give my two cents'.

I have been experiencing the rudeness and selfishness that you describe at my job for close to three years now. I only realized this afternoon that I don't "own" the bad behavior of others, and yet, I've let it get to me.

This behavior has been backed up and "institutionalized" by the folks in power at this company. The surprising part of all this is that it is a company largely staffed and directed by women!

I'm glad to see that there are a few souls left who believe in civility and respect for others. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.


Bernie said...

Brad, so glad to hear your point of view....I do hope you do not allow others to change you....as long as you respect yourself, hold your head high and live your life to your standards you can make a difference in our world...:-) Hugs