Hello everyone, I had a wonderful, happy and pain free day today. Thank you God. Now I don't mean to sound selfish but as I made my way into bed tonight I couldn't help but wonder, question, why can't every day be like these past two days. I mean what is it that keeps me from having pain one day compared to those ugly days so full of pain. I was so thankful I couldn't stop my tears, they were tears of joy. ( now I am not a crier) I so appreciate my life but I don't understand what I do differently that causes my health to change like it has lately. I am the same, I eat the same, I do the same things, what is it then that causes that pain. If only I knew, or if any one knew then I could stop doing it. I think it's time I quit trying to control this neuropathy and just accept it but somehow, right now, I'm not able to do this. There has to be a way to figure out for all of us who suffer this disease, some how find a way of the do's and dont's. I for one would try anything suggested to be able to use my feet and hands without the fear of having it come back. Sounds dumb I know, but today was such another beautiful day and I who always have prayed to be able to accept and not question, and who has been blessed to be able to accept everything I have been dealt in my life, prayed a different pray tonight. I want to know how I can help myself, I love being able to feel my feet and hands normal, and never again do I want to have to crawl to my bathroom. I would even agree to be a guinea pig to test, whatever to not only help myself but others. There has to be something I can do, just has to be.
Sorry, I kind of got carried away there for a moment, but I guess my heart is over flowing with the joy of the last couple of days. Oh they have been the best. I went for a walk today and everything seemed so beautiful to me, the grass was greener, the sky was the color of blue topaz even the children I met along the way seemed sweeter. I know now why I was enjoying it all so much, I had no pain.
I went to church this morning and stopped at Tim's for coffee on my way home. When I got home I made my bed up fresh and then did 2 loads of laundry. I dusted, cleaned bathrooms and vacuumed. By this time I was ready to go out to the deck. I took my new Nora Roberts novel and a glass of ice tea and spent the most relaxing hour I can remember.
I came in to call my friend to apologize for missing her get together last night. I told her what happened and she was wonderful about it. She said "I should of called you," we really missed you" awwww, anyway they are having a card party the end of June and I promised I would make that one, she said "you will if I have to come and drive you myself" I laughed and was happy to hear that they all had a great time. I was glad I had waited until mid afternoon before I called as it was as I thought, she had a long night and had just woke up. It was so nice to talk with her, when we all worked together we were like family with each other. It will be good to see them in June.
My friend Terry called, her brother in law is still in ICU, they have put him in induced coma and he is on a respirator but the doctor's are quite optimistic he will make it through now where a few days ago they had some doubt. Terry is coming in for my birthday and we are going to do my flowers together. We always take each other out for dinner on our birthdays and in all these years we have hardly missed our birthdays together. Old school friends are special don't you think, I sure do. She is only staying over one night as she has other commitments on the 28th and I too have a hair appointment for a cut and streaks.
I then BBQ again for supper, I had left over potato salad, tossed salad and my favorite, macaroni salad in the fridge so I BBQ a chicken breast and with my salads supper was delicious. I love eating outside, everything taste better and even the day old salads had a special flavor. I have to say I always did like some foods better the next day and today was one of them.
I listened to the hockey game on the radio as I sat on the deck again today, oh life is good.
After 3 afternoons on my deck I am beginning to tan. I haven't tanned in many years as I would always sit in the shade but this year for some reason the sun doesn't bother me if I only sit in it for short periods at a time. I don't sit long enough to get a sunburn but it's nice to see some color on my arms, legs and face. I still stay outside, I just to move to the shade when I feel I might be burning.
I know I shared a lot of my emotions tonight, and like a written journal I share my day and the feelings that come with it. I hope all my American friends enjoyed Memorial Day and all of my friends have a Marvellous Monday. I plan to.
Good Night and God Bless.....:-)